Obsessing

I was reading McVie's post on obsession and felt the need to post a comment, and the comment grew into five paragraphs so I decided it deserved to be posted here. McVie said:

"Obsession is quite a powerful force. One’s sights are telephotoed into a singular object. But obsession, which is desire magnified, makes one blind to the bigger picture. And it does not take into consideration the feelings of the subject. The subject is objectified into a prized image, valued not for who they are but for what they mean to the ones aiming their sights at them. Perhaps it is when the subject is viewed not through one-sided, rose-colored lenses can a fuller picture of him emerge. Seen from all angles, the subject is not merely an image but a whole person, an individual imperfect with his human foibles and frailty as well as his strengths."

Well said, but the only problem I have with this line of thought is that we never really obsess about the people we have a chance to see the whole picture of. Yes? Familiarity breeds contempt for smelly feet and loud mouths. Or maybe you're nega-obsessing (as in wanting to believe that this person is the baddest person there is and you won't stop until you 'get' him) therefore familiarity becomes a pail of cold water.

Which makes obsession a really really bad thing. And badder still because when you have it, you're almost always blind to it. The only thing that makes you snap out of it is to see the bigger picture, but you rarely see it when it's painted for you by others.

If other people paint a picture and you buy it? You're not obsessed, no worries. If you simply refuse to listen to good advice and believe in something when evidence points to the contrary, maybe you're just pig-headed?

But if you start hacking email addresses, creating false FB accounts using his creds, stalking the places he frequents, talking to his friends and acquaintances and dentist and doctor and teacher and classmates to get more information, and all that weird stuff... stop. We have too many stalker stories already. Boring na. Obsess about non-people, like chocolate cake and white pointed leather shoes that look five sizes bigger.

But if you insist, then go ahead. But get a good lawyer. Or get a good bodyguard. Or get both. Some people will be flattered by your attention. Some will simply have an irresistible urge to flatten your nose until it meets your hypothalamus. Or the soles of your feet, even. Or earthworms.